I prefer dealing strictly in cash. That way, I don't end up owing people money. Personally, being in debt is a very, very bad thing. So, whenever possible, I make sure to pay people back promptly. This is helped by the fact that I don't forget when I owe people money. I may have a crappy memory regarding essentially my entire life, but I do remember even the smallest amount of cash I owe. Which is a good thing, I suppose. Or, at least, it would be, if I didn't feel incredibly guilty about borrowing money.
The guilt thing I can easily attribute to two sources: My reluctance to ask for help, and my Brother.
Now, my Brother is a decent guy. He has a steady job, and he doesn't get pissed off at people who try to improve themselves. But he is a f**kin' loan shark. With me, he charges compound five percent interest, per diem. So, naturally, I stayed away from borrowing. And because I never really borrowed as a child, I don't borrow as an adult. With one exception.
The only way that I will borrow money from someone is when it is clear that there is no interest, and the item I need the money for is either a book, or something I will use on a day-to-day basis. Like the shiney Permanent LJ account my Dad has gotten me. I now owe him US$150, but that is okay, since I use this place to put my thoughts and ideas into a place that is easily accessible. Or the laptop computer I currently owe the State of Maryland US$1500 for. I use this laptop daily, mainly for posting these journal entries.
My point, though, is that I now owe over one thousand dollars to various and sundry people and institutions. And it isn't comfortable.
I bombed out of my last semester of college. This isn't news to you, my faithful reader, but I needed to say it again. I met with someone from the Department Of Rehabilitation Services (DORS) today, on that very subject. You see, I had this spiffy laptop computer requisitioned for me, with the expectation that it would help me with my assignments and everything that required a written response.
Well, I was informed at the meeting today that, because I bombed my classes, I would have to relinquish the laptop. Either that, or pay the fifteen-hundred dollars it cost them, and I could keep it. Well, you can probably guess my decision. But for the especially dense people out there, it means that I am keeping this laptop. I just love it too much to give it up. And I have the means to buy it, so I'm only out US$1500, and that is okay in my book.
Well, it is at my current stage in life. I make that caveat because, eventually, there will come a time when I have to choose between something I want and something I need, where this computer would fall under the 'want' category.
Need and Want
I am fortunate to have a father who has taught me the difference between wanting something and needing something. Sorry. Just got a little sidetracked, there...
Where was I?
hrmm... This is awkward... I can't remember what I was going to say next...
Ah, screw it.
It prolly wasn't that interesting, anyway.
I bid you good night, as I have work in the morning.