Eddie (edminster) wrote,

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NaNoWriMo Day Holy crap, I think I've finished.

Right, so I had this idea a week or two back, and I just now got around to writing the majority of it. By no means could I call it finished, but I figured that since I only need about five hundred-odd words to finish the month, I may as well post it. So, here's the first story I've been writing in quite some time.

Does the world need superheroes?

Will you quit babbling and pick up your end of this thing?

In a minute, I'm going somewhere with this.

No. No minutes. We are doing this now, or not at all. I am tired of this conversation.

What conversation? I'm just asking a simple question, man.

Pip, it's always a simple question with you. We've been working together going on three months, and I have yet to hear an instance of you opening that annoying mouth without spouting off some half-baked pseudo-philosophical idea that should never have seen the light of day, or even worse some retarded-ass question about why things are the way things are.

All I'm tryin' to say is that-

Shut up! We have a job to do, and we're doing it now. Save that metaphorical bullcrap until after we get this done, alright?

Jeez, alright.

*pauses while helping lug a large duffel bag into the rear of a nondescript van, then shuts the doors after it has been loaded. They both enter the van in an uncomfortable silence. Dave starts the van, Pip buckles himself in, looking pensive. After about three minutes of silence*

I mean, seriously. What kind of wo-


but i ju-

Goddamn it! I am sick and tired of this shit! I've tried being nice, Pip, I really have. But you just come up with the stupidest goddamn thoughts. If we didn't have a job to do, I'd fucking run this van off into a tree. So, unless what you were about to say directly pertains to what we are doing right fucking now, I swear to you, on my life, that I will kill you in the most painful way that I can possibly figure out. And I've got a pretty good imagination, Torquemada ain't got shit on me when it comes to thinking up unpleasantness. Understand?

*Pip sheepishly nods, Dave takes a nice, calming breath. Then another. Then says*

Shit. I'm sorry, Pip. I didn't mean to blow up at ya. It's just been really stressful, you know? The Holiday seasons just starting, and I got bills to pay and mouths to feed. Hell, most of that yelling wasn't directed at you anyway. I just needed an excuse to let off steam, ya know?

*Pip, in a small, very hurt voice says*

Did... did you really mean all those things you said about me? 'Cuz I can work on tr

*Dave, interrupting*

No, Pip, you're fine. Like I said, it's been stressful at home, lately.

*more silence, distinctly uncomfortable*

Look, Dave. I'm just trying to ask you whether or not you think that superheroes are something we need, considering the state of the world. Is our current life something that would require some caped crusader to solve the problems? And how could he escape all of the police after him for all the laws he goes about breaking while bringing down the bad guys?

Huh. I never really thought about it. I suppose it could be seen as a form of vigilantism, what with all of the people that would have to die in order to guarantee the safety of the general public. I would think that the cops don't look too hard for him, since he really is doing their job for them.

Yeah, but everybody slips up eventually. So it's really just a matter of time until the Hammer of Justice comes down on some innocent sap's head. What then? If the superhero kills an innocent, what will the people think? Are superheroes like beloved guard dogs? If so, does that mean they must be put down the instant they maul a toddler? They do that to dogs, you know. Happened to a friend of mine. He was broken up about it for weeks.

Um... well, I suppose this Justice character would have to be impossible to catch. Either that, or otherwise invincible. I mean, he wouldn't be much of a superhero if he could be taken down by just anyone. It should take some sort of Supervillain to lay him low.

Eh? I didn't mean to say that the hero guy was called Justice, but I guess it's pretty catchy. Heh. I like it. But you said something about a supervillain. How would one go about becoming a supervillain? I mean, we've established that a superhero need to be immune to everything that us low types can throw at him. How the hell could a supervillain take him down?

Maybe Justice has a weakness? I mean, some sort of achille's heel that could keep him in check. Like, silver, or something.

Silver? I think you're talking about werewolves. Which is another topic to be discussed if we ever work our way out of this superhero conundrum. So, a supervillain would have to have something over the hero guy, right? What keeps him from sharing that secret with all of the other ne'er-do-wells out there? Think he's selfish?

Wait a second, Pip. I just realised something. How would a supervillain survive? I mean, assuming he can take down a hero because of some secret weakness, what's to keep us 'low types' from kicking his ass? He would have to be as impossible to take down as the hero. Which means that if the villain guy played his cards right, he could kill off half the population before being taken down by the hero. Think about that, would you?

Jeez, you're right. Makes me glad that there aren't any really bad guys out there. I mean, if you think about it, you cou-

Pip, I meant for you to comtemplate that in silence.


Yeah. Not that great. It's a start, though. It's also an end. I suppose it's fitting that I'm finishing the whole challenge with a story, considering that that is what I should have been doing this entire month anyway. So, yeah. I'm done, and for the first time ever I have finished a NaNoWriMo.

Yup. I finished. The official wordcount according to the NaNoWriMo site is 51300. Pretty good for a month that started with me predicting I would fail, don't you think? Anyway, enough about me being incredibly pleased with myself. Goodnight, everybody. Stay safe out there.

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